Mark Grogan

Mark Grogan is one of the original Warlocks lineup and one of the team's all-time leading appearance makers. He started his Warlocks career as a goalkeeper, however after a multitude of appalling performances and accusations of match-fixing he was moved out to defence in a move of pity by manager Takis Anatolitis. Grogan has since established himself as a regular in the heart of the Warlocks' defence.

Known for his offensive combinations of shorts and socks, Grogan has become a fixture in the Warlocks' starting lineup. Critics have suggested that his continued selection is owed largely to his cooperation in providing regular transportation to matches for manager, Anatolitis.

Unconfirmed figures from the respected website www.madeupstats.org have revealed that no other player in the history of Charlie's Warlocks has been to blame for more opposition goals than Grogan. Furthermore, Powerleague Magazine listed him at #3 in their list of the Top 10 Most Ineffectual Warlocks Players of All Time. Grogan holds the team record for goals conceded by a goalkeeper in a single match, letting a whopping 28 shots slip through his fingers in a disastrous defeat at the hands of Season 1 opponents 40 Aday in only the Warlocks' third ever match. In addition to this he also has the lowest goals-to-games ratio of any regular outfield player ever to wear the Warlocks shirt. In short, he's a bit of a legend, like Adi Akinbiyi.

Recent comparisons to Wolverine, due to the abundant ovegrowth of his patchy facial hair, have been far wide of the mark. Far from being the titanium fused skeletal warrior he was once heralded as, he broke his toe by trying to kick a ball. Endearing yet pathetic at the same time. His Wolverine status has since been removed.

Grogan's composure in front of goal has been likened to that of Fernando Torres in his early days at Chelsea, however what he lacks in finishing, he makes up for in....err. Well he can be seen running and walking around the pitch while his team busts their arses. Grogan can often be heard hurling unwarranted abuse from the sidelines at his fellow Warlocks. In his spare time time Grogan is a keen ear toucher and often sets up Jurassic Park nights round his house to help boost team morale. As yet, nobody has ever shown up.

External Links:

Grogan definition: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=grogan